This week went by way too quickly. I didn’t accomplish as much as I should have. I was supposed to contact Birth and Beyond. This organization provides free services for low income families expecting a new baby. They have a center right here in North Highlands. But I just haven’t had the motivation to get off of my butt and go down there. It is hard to get motivated when you are depressed.
I’m also supposed to contact MediCal again and update our income again. They made a mistake and have us making a lot more money than we actually do. Because of this we have what is called a share of cost. What this means is that we have to spend x amount of dollars out of our pocket before MediCal will kick in. We can not afford this. And I have my doctor’s appointment on Tuesday. I hope I won’t be too late if I fix this on Monday. I can’t afford to spend money on my appointment. Again I am going to blame the depression and the fact that I hate going down to the Department of Human Assistance.
I have to do these things on Monday. But that means sacrificing something else. Either my blog will get neglected, preschool or housework. Or I will have to give up a combination of the three. Either way I am going to have to give into something so I can get off of my butt and head over to Watt Ave. to go to those two places. It stinks too because I am going to have to drag both little ones with me.
Chris had an uneventful work week. He has another week of 40 hours. If he’s working full time now you’d think they would provide benefits but unfortunately they don’t. So he is still looking for a better job. I really want him to search in other states other than California. For one thing we need to move out of this house after the baby is born because this place is just too darn small. But he needs a better job so we will be able to afford a bigger house. I don’t want to end up living in Tent City.
Courtney had a good school week. Her sore throat is much better and she did not have strep. She went to school every day. Yesterday was supposed to be “pie day.” Instead of having math class the kids were going to have a party and eat pie. But all school mass fell on the same time as the “pie day” celebration so it is postponed until Monday.
Ciara was terrible from Monday- Thursday. Every single day she misbehaved. On Monday she took her brand new bottle of shampoo and her brand new bottle of bath bubbles and dumped them in the tub. Because of my stress level, pregnancy hormones and depression I overreacted. I did not know how to handle the situation. First I spanked her, then I sent her to her room, then I cried, then I called my husband, after that I threw up and cried some more. It took me a few hours to calm down. I am scared to death that I won’t be able to handle these situations anymore. At least until I feel better about myself. The thing is we don’t have a whole lot of money and last week I did have a little extra so I bought her the special shampoo and bubble bath. Normally I just use regular soap and the few sample bottles of baby wash I have left from the hospital when Conan was born. I’ve never bought them bubble bath. So I was hurt by her actions. Am I a bad mother because of it? I don’t think so.
The rest of the week Ciara made messes every single day and refused to clean them up. I tried every form of discipline in the book to get her to listen. She refuses to listen to Mommy. So when Daddy came home I had him handle the situation. I don’t know if she is more intimidated by him or what but she always listens to her dad. My counselor thinks that I need to read the book Parenting with Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility. They also have a book designed just for toddlers and preschoolers, Toddlers and Preschoolers: Love and Logic for Early Childhood Six Months to Five Years. I should probably read both books.
Conan is learning new things every day. One day I decided I would teach preschool to both of them. I didn’t know how much Conan would pay attention so I sat him down with some crayons and a coloring book while I worked with Ciara. When we were doing the counting flash cards he decided to count along with us. He was able to count all the way to 20 just like Ciara. I was amazed. He is soaking everything up. Conan is doing better on the potty. I managed to get him on it every day but he still hasn’t gone yet. He hates putting a diaper on so I always give him a choice. He can either wear a diaper or sit on the potty first. Conan always chooses the potty. The other night he told his daddy that he wanted to go potty. Chris tried to put him on his little potty but he did not like that. He wanted to sit on the big potty just like Ciara.
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