Children can be stubborn and they know how to tune their parents out. If you are in a parenting rut and finding it difficult to get your kids to listen, here are a few tips that have been tested and proven to work to get any child to listen.
1. Withhold privileges until he does what is expected.
If your son refuses to clean his room or pick up his toys take away something that he values like video games, television, computer or electronics until he picks up his toys. For teenagers you can take away the car keys or her cell phone until the task is complete.
2. Use a reward system.
Reward systems like sticker charts, or a special prize box filled with small toys can help encourage positive behavior for younger children. If you have more than one child, offering a prize to his older sister when she makes her bed without you asking will motivate the younger brother to do the same thing. You can also create a sticker chart with each child’s name. Reward them a sticker when they listen and do a small chore. Then can then earn a small prize or a special game or movie night when they have a certain amount of stickers on their chart.
3. Praise your child for good behavior.
A little bit of praise will encourage the good behavior to continue. If your daughter offers to help you with the dishes, show your appreciation by saying “Thank you.” When your young sons are sharing their toys and playing nicely together let them know that they are doing a super job sharing and getting along.
4. Get his attention to begin with.
We often call out instructions to our kids when they’re watching TV or playing. When they don’t listen that just causes us parents to get frustrated. Make sure you have your child’s attention before speaking. Tell; don’t ask. If you want your daughter to put her plate in the sink, say so. But don’t phrase it as a question. Saying, “Sweetie, would you please put your plate in the sink?” makes it optional.
5. Follow through.
If you ask your son to do something, don’t let it slide. Examine your expectations. When your child is struggling with a task, think about it and ask yourself these questions. Did I explain exactly what’s expected and show how it’s done? Is the task appropriate for my child’s age? Walk your child through the task to make sure he understands.
6. Keep the tone positive.
When kids feel respected, they’re more likely to be their best selves. Instead of “Why do you always throw your jacket on the floor when you come into the house?” try “Let’s find a way to help you remember to hang up your jacket.”
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